MÅNI Words I Andrea

Andrea sent a greeting from a spring-like New York with inspiring thoughts about being enough and the importance of landing in oneself.

Name: Andrea Pohl

Age: 49

Occupation: Organizational Psychologist

Location: Stockholm

How do you describe yourself?

It’s a delicate question; I would say I am brave, quite disarming. I judge people very little, which is probably why I earn the trust of so many. At my core, I am interested, curious, and exploratory.

What do you like most about yourself?

I appreciate my ability to stand up for myself in the big picture. However, I struggle with this in the smaller aspects of life. By this, I mean that when it comes to major life decisions, I find it easy to advocate for myself. But in small everyday situations, I can become very avoidant and tend to adapt. This can happen when there's a risk of conflict or if I become overly understanding of another person's situation or feelings; I easily adjust in those circumstances. I fear disappointing others or not living up to expectations. However, in the long run, I am not avoidant at all.

Describe your favorite bath

My absolute favorite bath is during the summer months in Sweden. It has to be in the sea if I have to choose a favorite. I love swimming in the sea; there is nothing that makes me feel as reborn as that. Morning swims are especially enjoyable.

What do you fill your days and your life with?

I fill my days with my work. I provide treatments for stress and leadership development for managers who face various challenges or need to progress in certain areas. I also fill my life with children and everyday life. I need exercise to keep going, primarily through running.

I sometimes miss doing more enjoyable things for myself; there is too little time for that. I would like to plan more trips, short ones often. Things that I know I enjoy but that come second.

I wish I had the energy and time to be more social. It’s also difficult in everyday life to know and predict how the days will look, and I want to ensure that I have time to settle myself. I have a great need to be alone and find my balance or maintain it.

How does your life today compare to five years ago?

Five years ago, I lived in a large villa in Saltsjö Duvnäs with my husband and four children, one of whom was a 6-month-old baby. I was living a cohabitation life with all four children living at home. Today, I live in an apartment in Hammarby Sjöstad with two children at home, Hilding, 14, and Harry, 5.5. My two oldest daughters have moved out.

In terms of work, things look quite similar. A significant difference today is that I have better skills in stress management and a much more balanced life. It doesn't get as easily overwhelming today as it could back then. I experience much less helplessness in managing stress and what stresses me; I have increased control. It is definitely practice that has made me better equipped; you don't get very far with just insights. I have reached this point with the help of skill training and practice in various tools that bring about change.

What does health mean to you and what is your main advice for feeling good?

Sleep is number one. Also, keeping stress levels down, accepting that it can get hectic from time to time, and taking time for recovery is essential. The question always arises about what is restorative. A sure bet is having personal time and the opportunity to reflect. That is fundamental for me. Physical activity is also important; running helps me. Much of what happens in the body and mind regulates itself when you exercise, which otherwise requires more effort to balance.

I have previously spent more time on meditation. I still use meditation, but I do it quickly to reduce stress. I no longer meditate as proactively as I used to. Otherwise, I find that having reflection time can provide the same effect. I can sit without any stimuli for half an hour and not actively seek anything. I believe it has the same effect on me.

However, I do practice meditative breathing and relaxation throughout the day, although it might only be for 5 minutes. It's possible that I could schedule longer meditation sessions, but often it's the lack of time that prevents it from being prioritized.

What is happiness for you?

It may sound gloomy, but experiencing sufficiency, being in tune with myself, and truly enjoying my children is happiness. Feeling genuine joy from having my children around is pure happiness. To be able to do this, one must be reasonably balanced, not overly stressed or sleep-deprived. It's about not rushing through life.

What do you want to share with other women?

To have faith that life is hopefully reasonably long and that you don't have to do everything at once. Nothing becomes enjoyable by trying to do it all at once—pursuing a career, having children, renovating, moving, etc. Trust that there is life after 40 and 50 as well. I also wish that more women would feel less guilt over a sense of inadequacy. To be able to rest in one's sufficiency, not to be demanding of oneself, and to be less self-critical.

Tell us about a journey that made a big impression on you?

I must say the journey of having children: pregnancy, giving birth, breastfeeding. It's no coincidence that I have four children, and I have felt good during my pregnancies. Taking care of a little child, talking about sufficiency, one is sufficient just by sitting and breastfeeding. One can rest in that. Those periods have been a rest within myself; I haven't chased so much during those times in life and haven't put myself in the center. Setting oneself aside and not taking oneself too seriously while having a more important task has been very educational and developmental.

What type of vacation are you? City, sea, nature, adventure?

Skiing in the Alps or mountain environments has to be my number one. But I also love Gotland or nature other than the one I live in, and having very close access to swimming is probably the meaning of life. I would love to live by the sea.

If you could only listen to one song for the rest of your life, what would it be?

Lars Winnerbäck, Mareld.

Give us a book recommendation, what should we not miss reading?

Self Compassion by Kristin Neff. I actually say this based on what we want to give to other people. The need to feel a bit of self-compassion is so great today. We often don’t have the time or energy for everything we want and can do. We need to feel a bit more kindness towards ourselves in all of that.

Which MÅNI garment do you like the most? Bikini high tide and Dunes smocked top, practical and beautifully designed, in green, with cola flip flops.

Dunes Bikinitopp Skog

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